I love finding new ways to look at the same old stuff. By throwing things into the air and seeing where everything lands I give myself the space to explore, expand, and further know my own truth. The concept of being what I want to see in the world came from this exploration and it has been a game changer for me.
I recently had been talking about trust with a group of executives. The need to have trust within an organization or team to do great work. The desire to embody trust to be a great leader. The hope to see trust in others to be able to move ideas forward efficiently. Trust might look slightly different depending on who was talking, but the importance of trust was unanimous, both as a precursor to and desired outcome of any impactful decision and/or relationship.
But what if there isn’t trust? What then?
This is where things got really interesting. It seems that most people see this essential element - trust – as a pretty limited resource that is tough to get and even harder to keep around over time;
- I need to “know” that everyone is generally on the same page…before I can trust
- I need to figure out how to rebuild trust that has been lost…so that I can trust
- I need to know that [my team] has my back…to be able to trust
- Basically, I need to see the proof that I can trust… THEN I will be able to trust
But what if trust doesn’t actually work this way? What if trust is NOT a conditional experience? What if waiting for proof keeps the thing we truly want at arm’s length? What if waiting for proof puts our desired experiences at the mercy of other people and things? What if the only way to truly experience trust is to CHOOSE to experience it no matter what is going on around us? What if we cannot experience trust until we simply decide to take responsibility for experiencing it for ourselves?
And this goes beyond trust. What if the thing we want is already right in front of us, in the place where we are courageous enough to put a stake in the ground and just decide to experience it?
Love?
Freedom?
Self-worth?
Confidence?
Collaboration?
Openness?
Acceptance?
When I wait for the external world to validate my experience, I am left waiting and waiting and waiting. But when I have the nerve to completely flip the script - I get to experience the thing I want RIGHT NOW, TODAY, regardless of what is going on around me.
At the end of the day, whether or not someone is nice to me or loves me or believes in me or trusts me actually has zero bearing on whether or not I can be and feel nice-ness, love, confidence, or trust. The only person who truly can control my experience is me and so I can live my life waiting, or I can take it into my own hands and decide instead to be what I wish to see in the world.
Where in your life are you living conditionally? Could you flip the script? What have you got to lose?
Go be what you want to see.